Who I love and hate

Hey blog,

Despite it being the 69th day of the year, my favorite day of the year because throughout the day I ask every girl I see to engage in some salacious tomfoolery with me, I'm mad as a mad scientist. Why you ask? It's Becky, that girl just drives me up the wall. When I look at Becky I feel a burning hatred in my cold dark heart. She freezes it over and numbs it to the point where I just want to rip it out and stomp on it to show her what a sorceress of the nasty she can be. She has no idea, absolutely no clue, and never can. She's nothing like Alyssa, my tall glass of wonderful. How I wish I was curled up in her arms like a narcoleptic bear of some sort...

First Entry

Dear blog,

Right now I'm sitting in the Coffee Pot pretending to loove Erin Brockovich. Really, it's masking the deep-seeded love I have for Alyssa and all her wondrous beauty. She is like rain on a soft summer morning, and though I pretend to care about movies and TV shows and crap like that, it's all just my way of hiding that I totes got the hotts for her, with two T's. That's right. Kelsey's not bad either...I guess. She has that little midget-guitar deal that she whips out a bunch and I really don't like that. But Alyssa, that girl can rock my world so much it hurts...it hurts so good is what I mean to say. One day she'll know of the undying love, it's an endless love, and she'll know that every time I talk to any girl, including my mom, I'm thinking of her and mentally plastering her face on them. I'm hungry now. I think I'll go eat a grilled cheese sandwich and dedicate it to her, secretly.